Filed to story: Falling for My Ex's Mafia Dad Novel Free PDF (Fay Alden & Kent Lippert)
“You can’t go out that way,” he snaps, his arms still crossed over his chest. “You’ll be seen.”
And a really, really big part of me wants to tell him to fuck off and to throw open the door, striding out into the hallway for everyone to see for Alessi to see that Kent was keeping me in there, hidden, the whole time.
But the other part of me the part that’s still in this, that wants Kent to trust me…
I drop the knob and, still glaring at him with what pride I have left, stride for the door to his bedroom. But I don’t look at him as I pull the book and pass through, walking quickly through the bedroom and towards the passage.
And then I go through that too, my rage and anger and sadness building in me with every step because…
Fuck.
I think…I think Kent and I just broke up.
Even though we were never really together not officially, not in any real way outside of his own bedroom
But I gave Kent the ultimatum. I told him to tell me the truth, to trust me, or I was gone.
And he made his choice.
And I realize the finality of that as I walk through the cold underground passage at the bottom of the house, grief sweeping through me, replacing my rage. By the time I pull myself up the winding staircase to my room, and push through the door in the back of my wardrobe, tears are streaking down my face.
“Fay!” Daniel gasps and I jump a little as I step into my room and see him sitting on my bed. I hadn’t realized that he was here that he was going to see me like this. “Are you what’s wrong? What happened?”
“Nothing,” I murmur, hiccoughing a little. But I immediately prove this a lie as I start to cry harder. Daniel sighs and comes to wrap his arms around me.
“What did he do?” Daniel asks quietly, angry now. “What did he say to you?”
“Nothing,” I insist, pushing away from him a little, not wanting to talk about it.
“Seriously, Fay what “
“Daniel,” I sigh, looking up at him with an honest plea on my face. “I just I don’t know. I haven’t even processed I think he broke up with me? But I need…”
Daniel gasps and glares at the door, but I sigh, realizing that…that is not the energy I need. Slowly, I raise a hand to Daniel’s cheek and turn his face back to me.
“Can I Daniel, do you think I can be alone tonight?” I ask softly. “I just want to cry in my bed. Alone. Okay?”
“Are you sure?” he asks softly, his voice all sympathy and concern. “I can come back bring snacks, wine, we can trash Kent all night ”
I laugh a little despite myself but shake my head. “Honestly, Daniel,” I sigh. “I just…want to be alone. I want to go to sleep.”
“Okay,” Daniel says softly, and as I turn into the bathroom to take a long hot shower, I hear him move to the door.
“I love you, Fay,” he calls to me gently. I turn to smile a little at my best friend.
“I know,” I reply. “I love you too.”
And he quirks one side of his mouth at me before passing through my bedroom door and leaving me alone.
As soon as he goes, the grief hits me like a wall. And I turn the water in the shower to scalding hot, and strip down, and climb in, and sit on the wet tiled floor with my head in my hands.
Wondering what the hell I’m going to do next.
I pull myself out of the shower a ridiculously long time later, only really leaving because the water that was falling on my shoulders had grown colder and colder until I was shivering. I towel myself off, shaking my head a little to consider that while I’m all cried out, my tears didn’t bring the relief that I thought they would.
Because honestly, I’m still a wreck about this.
I know what I’m supposed to do now, I think as I wrap my big fluffy white robe around myself and pass into my bedroom, sitting down hard on my vanity’s stool, still shivering a little. I’m supposed to leave. Kent gave me his answer to my ultimatum I said I would go if he didn’t tell me, and he didn’t. So now…
I’m supposed to go.
But god damn it, where to?
And honestly, I’m fully aware of the fact that I don’t want to go anywhere. I want to stay right here, with Daniel and with Kent who are now basically my family. I want to stay here, and work things out, and convince Kent that we can fix this
But really? Is that even worth my time?
I shake my head at my pale face in the mirror as I start to brush the tangles out of my wet hair, feeling very pathetic. Kent has demonstrated time and time again that he doesn’t really trust me, that I’m just…a pleasant distraction for him. One of his many, many mistresses.
Nothing special.
And if I continue to let him treat me like that…
I mean, I know it was part of the contract. But I always thought it was more.
But now that I know it’s how he really feels…
Will I ever be able to respect myself again if I continue in a relationship with a man who just views me as a girl who he just considers his pretty little secret? Who comes to his room every night at his beck and call, and to whom he doesn’t give anything in return?
I scowl at myself a little when I think this, because I’m fully aware that he has given me things in return a great deal of money, a horse, a beach house I’ve never been to
But nothing…nothing that I really want. Nothing I really care about.
And as I stare at myself in the mirror I make myself say the words I’ve been avoiding for a long time now.
“I want him,” I confess to myself, my voice soft. “All of him.”
And then the tears start to slide down my face again as I realize it’s not something that’s ever been on the table. That I’ll never, ever get this thing that I very, very much want.
Not as cried out as I thought I was, I think, looking down at my hands sitting limply in my lap.
I’m still crying a few minutes later when a sharp knock comes up at the door.
To emotionally exhausted to even really be curious, I slowly stand up and cross to the door. When I open it, no one’s standing there, but I’m not surprised. I look down, fully expecting to see a little note delivered.
I’m not disappointed.
I pick up the note, bringing it into my room and turning the lock after I close my door. I open the note without even moving to my bed and quickly read the three words printed there in Kent’s tiny, precise handwriting.
Come downstairs, Fay.