Filed to story: Sorry Alpha I Am Wolfless Novel
Slowly, as if the tension was melting from her body, I felt my Little Bunny relax just a little.
“I know, Joaquin.” Her voice was soft and shook just a little. “But even though I see them, even though I can hold them, it still doesn’t feel real to me yet. It’s almost like a dream right now and I am just waiting for the nightmare part of it to set in again. I’m scared, and I’m nervous. I’m afraid to close my eyes and look away from them for even a second. I don’t want to miss something or to have them disappear on me.” I could tell that she was close to crying, and that she needed me more than I thought.
I slid onto the bed next to her, my hip pressed against her so she had that little bit of extra touch to sooth her. My arms came to rest on her back, near her shoulders. With my head still leaning against hers, I was able to look down and see the baby that was sleeping in her arms. We were so close, the three of us were all touching in some way.
“I know you’re scared, honey. I know you are. I am scared too. I have been since the day you got pregnant. I wasn’t able to save you last time, and that has eaten away at me every minute of every day since. We lost our first chance at being parents, but having Reagan and Rika isn’t like a redo or a second chance for us. They’re not replacements for what we lost.”
I watched as Riviana lifted her eyes to look at me instead of our daughter; we were now looking into each other’s eyes instead at the child we had made together.
“I know that from this day forward, until the day that I pass from this world, I will never forget the first baby that we lost. He or she would have been here, they would have been a few months old by now. They were stolen from us, and we have to wear that scar for the rest of our lives. What that scar will mean for us though, is that we will never once take our children for granted. We will know the fragility of their lives, and we will protect them fiercely. What this scar means for me is that I will do my absolute best to keep any and all dangers away from all of you. I would give my life to protect you all in a heartbeat, but I would rather be there to watch over you all in person.”
I gave her my best smile, letting her know that I was trying to be supportive, and even with the things that I was saying, this was hard for me too. I wasn’t done though, I needed to keep going.
“What this scar means for you, Riviana, is that you will be a great mother. You will love our children with all of your heart. I know that you will put them first in everything. They will come before you, before me, before our friends and family that are waiting to meet them. These children, and any other children we have in the future, will never want for love from either of us.”
I smiled as I saw the way she was looking at me. I know that look meant she was agreeing with me. She was going to love them too much at times, but that was impossible.
“I know that I am going to have to remind you over the years to take care of yourself and to do things for yourself. That’s OK though. We will both be dedicated to our children and to each other. We will be a strong, loving, and happy family.”
I rubbed her back a little and pulled her just a little closer. I wanted her to know that I meant every word that was coming out of my mouth, that I wasn’t just placating her, and for that she needed to feel the emotions flowing from me and into her. She needed to know how strongly I felt about this.
“Whenever you are scared, whenever you are worried about something, Riviana, I want you to come to me. I want you to tell me what you are feeling and share that burden, no matter what it is. I will do the same for you. I will protect you and our children from harm, but that is physically. I need you there for the emotional shield as well. I can’t do that part without you. You and I are both pillars in this life of ours. It may seem shaky and scary right now, but hold on tight to me babe, and I will make sure that the foundations are strong.”
Riviana laughed then, like she was finding everything too funny to hold it in anymore.
“Fido, I love you.” She giggled.
“Yeah, I know. And I love you too.” I grinned at her.
“You know, you didn’t have to go and make that whole speech, I knew most of that stuff already.” There were tears in her eyes, but she was smiling nonetheless.
“Yeah, I know you knew it, but you seemed to be wavering. So, I thought I should reaffirm it all for you.” I kissed the tip of her nose. “You and I became family when we mated, but we shared vows with each other eight months and fourteen days ago.” I grinned at the fact that it had been such a rounded number. “Today, we became not just a couple that was mated and married. No, today we brought our children into this world and became a real family. I am a father, and you, Riviana Gray, are a mother. We have three children total, two here with us and one watching over us from the eternal hunt. That child, whoever he or she would have been, is a part of us as well as Reagan and Rika. That baby is waiting for us, but they’re not alone. Your mother and my father are there as well, and together the three of them are watching over us all.”
“Joaquin.” She sobbed a little. “How did I get lucky enough to have you?”
“That’s something else, Little Bunny, I’m the lucky one. I was such a bad mate in the beginning that I nearly lost all of this. I am the one who should be thanking my lucky stars and the Goddess every day, grateful that I have you and these babies with me now.”
I kissed her lips then, soft and gentle as she nearly started to cry again.
“That’s enough now.” I slid my arm under Rika softly, I managed not to wake her as I slid her toward my chest. “You need to sleep, my love. I will watch over you and our babies. You need to get some rest so that you can take care of them with me.”
“I love you Joaquin.” She smiled, but laid back against the pillow that was behind her.
“And I love you, too. I love you to the moon and back, to the stars and beyond, forever and ever.” I grinned at her as I said the slightly childish words. I couldn’t help but say them; they were true after all.
“I love you to the moon and back, to the stars and beyond, forever and ever.” She grinned and mimicked me.
With that she closed her eyes. She was so exhausted that she fell asleep almost instantly.
“See that, Rika?” I whispered as I looked down at the sleeping baby. “Mommy was so tired that she fell right to sleep. We need to let her rest for now. How about we go and meet some of your family? Do you think you and your brother would want to do that?” I couldn’t stop smiling. I was feeling so much love for my family.
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Joaquin
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Slowly, so I didn’t wake the baby or my wife, I slid off the bed and to my feet. I wanted to let Riviana get some rest so that she wasn’t exhausted in the morning. This day, since it was after midnight, was our first day as new parents. It was going to be fun and exciting and interesting, I just couldn’t wait for it all to begin.
I also couldn’t wait to go and show our families our babies. They were still waiting down the hall for someone to deliver some news. How about instead of news I bring babies. That would make them happy, wouldn’t it?
I walked over to the little crib-like bed that Reagan was laying in. With a little bit of adjusting, and some help from the nearby nurse, I managed to get both babies into my arms and positioned them so that they were sleeping soundly.
I didn’t want to wait any longer. I knew that everyone was likely tired and eager as they waited for me to come and tell them what was happening. I walked softly from the room, not wanting to jostle my children as I moved down the hallway.
I saw that the group of family members that were waiting for us were all still awake. They were slouching and sitting as comfortably as they could in the cramped space. That is, until Mom saw me walking toward them with the special deliveries in my arms. That was when she started jumping out of her chair and screaming for joy. I could hear her from down the hall.
“Oh my Goddess, oh my Goddess!” She was bouncing up and down, and everyone was turning to look in the direction she was looking. “They’re here! The babies are here!”
When I got to the door of the waiting room, it was already being pulled open, and Mom was covering her mouth with her hands to muffle her screams of joy as she continued to bounce around. When I was in the room, she took her hands from her mouth and started to cry, her hands flapping beside her like she was a crazy bird.
“Joaquin! Oh my Goddess, Joaquin! They are so beautiful! Oh my Goddess! My grandbabies! My first ever grandbabies!” Mom was almost sobbing as she stared at the babies with a smile on her face.
“They really are beautiful.” Eve was crying as well, hugging Wesley’s side as she smiled at the babies.