Filed to story: Falling for My Ex's Mafia Dad Novel Free PDF (Fay Alden & Kent Lippert)
Is this seriously it?
Did I turn down something that could have been great the equivalent big love that Kent and Lenai had for each other because I wanted to have sex with Kent? Did I seriously, seriously choose that? Just because Kent is hotter than Ivan because that, I can finally admit to myself is true but seriously, am I just a stupid girl who followed a hot guy down a path that’s going to lead to my death?
I start to panic a little bit now, pressing my hands over my mouth and forcing myself forcing myself to take deep breaths.
A few long moments pass and I start to calm down. But what I need, I realize, is a distraction. A big one. Because if I keep going along with this line of thinking, I’m going to completely freak out.
So, I reach out for the top magazine on the pile closest to my chair and drag it in front of my face, making myself flick through the pages and concentrate on the lewd photographs and the pulp fiction of a vintage Playboy from the 70s.
It takes a while, but eventually through a combination of forcing myself to concentrate, and willfully pushing away my questions about how much Kent loved Lenai, and whether I’m an idiot who is going to die because she was to sex-addled to be smart enough to get herself away, I begin to calm down.
And as I calm down, and let myself be distracted from what are, arguably, the more important questions…I find myself starting to become intrigued.
The first time I came down here into this basement, I had been way too embarrassed to truly engage with this literature, no matter how much Fiona encouraged me. Plus, I had stumbled onto that sex tape from Kent, which had been a step too far.
My eyes flick, just once, to shelf of unlabeled black tapes but then I decide against it. I didn’t need to compare his technique with other women to what he does with me. I just avoided one jealous panic attack perhaps best to avoid another.
But as I flick through the magazine this time, now that I have what is inarguably more experience under my belt though much less than Kent, I’m well aware I find myself not shy at all about exploring what I’m finding on the page.
Some of it does not appeal to me at all. The pictures of solo women bearing their bodies for the photographer don’t do much I’m pretty thoroughly straight, I’m aware, so while I can admire these women’s beauty, I flip through these sections pretty fast.
But the images of women actually paired with men…
Especially the ones of women on their knees with men standing in front of them…
These are the ones that have me lingering on the page, studying the men’s faces as they bury their fingers in these women’s hair, as they come completely undone…
And suddenly, quite suddenly, I realize something. And I blink, and put the magazine down in my lap. Because I know that Kent is going to expect me to show up tonight in his room all upset, demanding answers, making him swear that he feels nothing for Natalia and that he’s not going to leave me for her.
As I’ve made him do before.
And then, once he tells me what I want to hear, he’ll take me to bed and fuck me senseless until I can’t remember my name, let alone why I was mad at him. I’m well aware that Kent uses sex to influence with my emotions, to sway my decisions towards what he wants.
And I’m also aware that up until now? Well. Let’s just say it’s been worth it.
But as I glance back at the women on the pages of the magazine, and the men who stand above them with their eyes pressed shut, their mouths hanging open…
I begin to wonder…could I do the same to him?
And I snap the magazine shut, getting quite suddenly to my feet.
Because I think…it may be time to ry.
______________________
“Hey,” I say to Kent as I lean against the doorway after pressing open the door at the top of the stone steps, which opens soundlessly.
He turns to me, surprised. I’m earlier tonight than I usually am.
“Fay,” he says, smiling and sinking his hands into his pockets as he turns to me. “Hi.”
“Hi,” I reply, returning his smile, my own hands deep in the pockets of the fur-trimmed robe that Kent gave me forever ago. I’m wearing the pretty moccasins he sent me too, but both are a decoy. Because underneath this robe I am wearing a v-neck romper made with completely sheer fabric. Honestly, it barely counts as clothing, the way it dips all the way down to my belly button and barely skirts my ass before dipping between my cheeks. It’s uncomfortable and cold, frankly, but damn do I look good in it.
And I want him hard the moment he slips this robe from my shoulders. So. Sacrifices must be made.
“What are you doing here?” Kent asks me, smirking and taking a few slow steps towards me.
I pout and him, pretending to be disappointed. “Do you want me to go?”
“No,” he says instantly, slipping an arm around my waist and pulling me close to him. “I had…work to do. But it can wait.” He lowers his head then to his favorite place between my neck and my shoulder, deeply breathing in my scent as I wrap my arms around his neck.
“See that’s a shame,” I murmur, laughing a little as his breath tickles my skin. “Because I was hoping to ask you for a favor.”
“Really?” Kent asks, surprised and intrigued enough to lift his head and look me in the face again. “You want something from me?” A smirk comes to his mouth.
“Yes,” I say, biting my lip as an anxious little flutter starts in my stomach, because even though I’m feeling bold and I’ve had enough wine to make me braver than I usually am well. I never do anything like this. “Kent?” I ask, hesitating.
“Yes?” he responds, curious.
“Do you think you can teach me how to give you a blow job?”
Kent stares at me for a moment, going completely still not even blinking. I think he even forgets to breathe.
And then he hauls in a hard breath, choking on it a little as he take a stumbling step back. I can’t help but laugh, thrilled a little at the result. It’s not often that anyone sees Kent Lippert off balance, and I have to admit I enjoyed the sight.
“Seriously, Fay?” Kent asks, raising his eyebrows at me and taking one hand off my waist to cover his mouth as he coughs, recovering from his surprise. “Are you are you serious?”
“You don’t want to?” I ask, frowning a little, pretending to shrink away.
“No!” he says, grabbing at my waist and pulling me back, making me smile, though I try not to make it too victorious. “I mean yes or ” he takes a moment to steel himself, glaring down at me a little, perhaps figuring out that I’ve intentionally surprised him.
“Believe me, Fay,” Kent murmurs, his voice husky and slow now that he’s recovered himself, “there’s absolutely nothing I’d rather to do than teach you this particular skill.” And he takes a moment, then, to let his eyes drop to my mouth, to raise a hand to my face and run his thumb lingeringly over my lower lip. “I’m just…surprised that you don’t want to talk.”
“About what?” I ask, perhaps too innocently, looking up at him with wide eyes.
Kent smirks a little, studying my face, on to me now. “About Natalia,” he says. “I’m not unaware that you weren’t thrilled to see her seated on my lap tonight, feeding me ice cream.”
“Well,” I say with a little shrug, pulling away a bit. “If you’d rather me go get her so that she can blow you ”
Kent laughs a surprised, happy thing and pulls me back against him, which makes me grin. “Not a chance,” he growls. “But seriously, Fay,” he continues, studying my face.
And I let my façade drop a little, letting honesty peek through. Because really, tonight? It wasn’t Natalia I was jealous of. But I shove the thoughts of Lenai away. “Seriously, Kent,” I say, shaking my head a little bit and putting my hands flat against his chest as he tugs me closer. “Didn’t you say to trust you about Natalia?” I shrug one shoulder. “I trust you.”
And then I lower my eyes to his chest and bring my hands together, starting to unbutton his shirt. Kent lets me work for a moment before pressing a finger under my chin and making me pause and look up at him. “Really, Fay?” he asks, likewise quite serious. “Because…Fay, I don’t want you to hide it, if you’re feeling bad about it. Or do this because you think it will make me like you more than her. There’s no contest. We can we can talk about it if you want.”
I look up at him and let him see the honesty in my eyes for a moment, that I’m really not lying. And then I stand on my tiptoes so that my face is as close to his as I can get it, so that he can hear me well even though I only whisper.
“I don’t want to talk, Kent,” I say softly, holding his gaze the whole time. “I want something besides words in my mouth right now.”
Kent goes still again, and a smile starts on my mouth