Filed To Story: Between Two Kings: A Split or Swallow Book PDF Free
I can’t.
Her hands were clenched around the napkin in her lap, which was beginning to smolder. Tem could smell the burning fabric. She was sweating now, great droplets running between her breasts. It was as if she had the world’s worst fever.
You must control it.
I’m telling you, I can’t.
You can do anything, Tem.
I’m so angry, Caspen. I’m-HELP ME.
An immediate, soothing wave of calm flowed from his mind to hers. Tem leaned into it, pulling it desperately toward her, covering herself with as much of it as possible. It was like dunking her head in a cold bucket of water. Her eyes opened slowly, and when they did, clarity returned.
The dinner had gone on without Tem. Evelyn was still speaking, and Caspen was nodding his head at whatever she was saying. But Leo was staring straight at her, his gray eyes piercing hers. His face was drawn in a frown.
What’s wrong? he mouthed.
Tem shook her head. Leo’s frown deepened.
She must look like a mess right now. There was no way to hide the physical tells: the sweat, the flush, the shortness of breath. Even the candles couldn’t account for the smell of smoke that now hung in the air.
“Tem,” Leo said out loud.
The table fell silent as everyone looked at her.
Why had he done that? “Yes?” Tem answered as smoothly as she could.
Leo held her eye contact. “Is everything in order?”
“Of course,” she said. “I just need to freshen up. Will you excuse me?”
Without waiting for an answer, Tem stood and left the room. The cavernous ceiling of the hallway loomed over her as she ran for the closest bathroom, ending up in the one with the golden sink. Tem gripped the sides of the mirror, staring at her reflection. Her eyes were bloodshot. A single bead of sweat ran down her temple. She wiped it away with her hand just as a knock came at the door.
“Tem?”
A woman’s voice. One she’d heard before, in this very bathroom. Lilly, Leo’s sister.
Tem didn’t move. She didn’t want to see anyone right now. Not only that but she didn’t trust herself yet-what if she was still in danger of transitioning?
“Go away, Lilly.”
“Tem. Let me in.”
A moment passed. Tem had a feeling Lilly would stand there until she obeyed.
With a sigh, she opened the door. Without saying a word, Lilly drew her into a hug. At first, Tem stiffened at the contact. Then she let the embrace deepen, leaning on the woman before her and allowing herself to be held.
“What’s wrong?” Lilly murmured. “You can talk to me.”
Tem just shook her head. She couldn’t talk to anyone, couldn’t voice the doubts that gripped her like a vise.
“You still love him, don’t you?”
Tears stung Tem’s eyes. In reply, she squeezed Lilly tighter.
“Oh, Tem.”
There was nothing else to say. Tem simply cried.
Lilly held her for a long time-far longer than she needed to. When Tem’s sobs finally quieted, she still held her, gently, Tem’s face buried in her ice-blond hair.
“What are you going to do?” the princess whispered.
“I don’t know,” Tem whispered back. “I don’t think there’s anything I can do.”
“You could tell him how you feel.”
Tem shook her head.
Lilly pulled away, looking her straight in the eye. “You could,” she insisted. “He would be open to it. I know he would.”
But Tem had no idea whether that was true. And if Leo would be open to leaving Evelyn, it meant that Tem had made a mistake in sending him away. And Tem wasn’t ready to admit that to herself, much less Leo. Lilly knew nothing of the crest-she didn’t know this was all Tem’s fault. In her eyes, it probably seemed like Tem had simply changed her mind.
“They’re getting married,” Tem said. “It’s too late anyway.”
“It’s not too late until they’ve walked down the aisle.”
Tem blinked. “How can you say that?”
Lilly sighed. “Because my brother deserves better than Evelyn.”
It was difficult not to react to that statement. Tem was shocked to hear Lilly speaking so openly about her brother’s betrothed. It was then that Tem wondered whether Lilly knew about the bloodletting. Did she understand that the kingdom was now in dire financial straits because their main source of income had ceased? Perhaps Lilly assumed all was well. The castle was decorated extravagantly, after all, and Lilly hardly ever left it. There was no reason to believe anything had changed.
“He loves her.”
“He loves you too.”
Tem shook her head. “He shouldn’t.”
Lilly stepped closer, and the bathroom seemed to shrink. “The men in my family are ruled by their hearts. Do you think my brother is the first to fall for the wrong woman?”
Tem had no idea what that meant. Was she talking about Maximus? Tem knew nothing of the king’s love life and certainly wasn’t going to start asking now.
“Evelyn came back,” Tem said. “They’re happy together.”
“Are they?”
“She loves him.” But the words rang false.
“Do you really believe that?” Lilly whispered.
Another question she didn’t want to answer.
Lilly pursed her lips. “Evelyn loves power. And status, both of which my brother can provide.” She paused for a long moment before finishing quietly, “I want him to be happy.”
The tears were about to return. “I want that too,” Tem whispered.
Lilly’s hands found hers. “Then tell him the truth. He can’t be happy unless he knows how you really feel. He deserves to make his own choice.”
But Tem just shook her head. Even if she told Leo how she felt, there was no elegant solution. There were too many people involved-too many marriages. Her union with Caspen was only one of many things to consider. Tem knew Evelyn would not relinquish Leo-not as long as she thought there was something to be gained from him. She saw Tem as competition, as a player in her sick, twisted game. A game with a prize worth winning. A game Tem wanted no part of.