Filed To Story: Secret with Betas Daughter: Skylar Story Series
I know my place, have always known it, and now they are blurring those lines making it hard to keep my distance and keep myself from getting hurt. I can handle the physical pain from my bullies and training, I knowhow to heal from that, but the emotional pain that has been going on my whole life, I don’t know how to deal with that, so I kept my distance. I want to continue to keep my distance, but my wolf is right, we need our pack, or a pack “Is that why you ran? You run away everytime the focus is on you.”
Oliver asks, leaning forward, elbows on his la-lees.
Sam is keeping a running commentary for Sierra. I can tell she is upset that I won’t shift back to talk to them. My wolf is at least intimidating enough to keep them away. I don’t want anyone trying to come close or embrace me.
They don’t get to be sorry for all the things they ignored in the past, because they feel bad now. My friend doesn’t deserve this treatment and I would talk to her directly if I could, but I am holding out. I still have no reason to show them any kind of emotion and I can stay stoic in my wolf’s form. She can choose to forgive me later or just keep the distance and let me go like everyone else.
“Can we jump back really quick to the part where she shifted at thirteen? That’s incredible Skylar! Your wolf must be really special for you to shift so young. I still haven’t shifted yet.”
Sierra looks at me. understand why the guys shifted early and at the same time too. You are all really close and have a tight knit group and to top it off you are all high ranking wolves taking on your positions and training to be the next leaders. It makes sense that your wolves would come out and help you along with that.
But, Skylar wasn’t in line to be the next beta or in a position for her wolf to be needed like that. So why did she come early, why was it necessary, what happened?” She looks back at me, I’m pretty sure she set me up with that question.
This is an answer that I want to give her, but it comes with a nightmare I don’t want the guys to know. Something I have been avoiding telling her since the day we met. She knows it, too. She actually showed up when I received some of the scars on my back. I closed my eyes inside my wolf’s head. I didn’t want to see their expressions through her very clear vision at that revelation. “She showed up because you were being attacked didn’t she?” Cameron whispered, the first to catch on. He’s leaning forward, elbows on his knees. He looks up slowly waiting for my answer. It’s what I always thought, but my wolf and I never discussed it. She nods her head in agreement. “WHAT?!” My brother jumps up and shouts. “It was so bad your wolf had to show up early?! Damnit Skylar, wily didn’t you say anything to anyone?” He’s shaking so bad and his eyes keep changing from gray to black, showing his wolf is fighting to come out. He’s running his fingers in his hair and pulling at it so hard it’s standing up in certain places. My wolf lets out a warning growl, nothing offensive, just a warning to his wolf to get him in check Oliver jumps up and places a hand on his shoulder to try and help calm him down. “Dude, she doesn’t need this right now. She’s got her reasons for not going to anyone and you getting all angry and huffy is not going to get you the answers that you want. Mateo is breathing hard and struggling with his temper. I can feel the anger, worry and torment all rolling off of him in waves. We need to help or he’s going to rage and tear this place apart and the rest of your friends are going to get hurt trying to stop him. His wolf is having a hard time controlling both of their emotions.
My wolf is pleading for me to go to him. His wolf needs her, needs the comfort of his little sister. I’m still angry, but I get what she is saying. His anger is because of my situation and only I can calm him.
Fine, go to him. I take a deep breath and sigh. Once again their needs are greater than mine. We stand up slowly and walk over to him, rubbing up against his leg. I can feel his whole body shaking in anger. We just continue to circle him and nuzzle his legs.
We corne around to the front of him and look up into his eyes. He takes a few deep breaths and looks down at us, tears in his eyes. He’s trying to hold in the sadness and anger he feels and slowly raises his hand to run it through our fur just behind my ear.
My wolf purrs at the contact and she closes her eyes, letting the contact calm us both. I feel his weight shift and we open our eyes to see he has knelt in front of us, both hands on the sides of my wolf’s face, looking us directly in the eyes.
“I’m so sorry, Sky. I know I can’t take anything back or even begin to make it up to you, but Pm going to try. I thought if I just did what dad asked and kept my distance, it would take his focus off of you. I guess that idea backfired. I never knew how bad it was, because I put blinders on and just hoped everything was okay since you never complained about anything. You never got sick or asked for anything. That wasn’t because everything was fine though, was it?”
My wolf just shakes her head. His tears are silently falling now. “I don’t need details, if you don’t want to share, but I need to know the worst Sky. Why do you have scars that never healed properly? Why does it seem like you are a different person at school than on the training field or when you’re just with us?”
His intentions are true and real. Let them in a little. I understand why you don’t want to give them names. You are right, they do not get to have revenge for what has been done to you.
That is for you only. But, let them understand the result of their neglect so they can begin to change their ways. They cannot grow without being taught. You are a teacher, teach them. My wolf advises. I grumble in her head. This is exactly what I didn’t want to do. I don’t want to talk about the things in my nightmares. Just the thought hurts. They need something to work with. You can make it as simple or as detailed as you want. Maybe some graphic descriptions will be good for them. Did she just make a joke out of my torture? Fine. I said to her, then to the guys, I need some clothes, this will be easier to explain in human form. Sierra deserves to hear this from me directly.
Before I finished, large t-shirts were dangling in front of me. My wolf had to blink a couple times at the fast movement. She grabbed one gently in her teeth. She took a big inhale, Dakota, the scent instantly calming me. We walked behind a tree and shifted, then I pulled on the oversized shirt.
I know these guys are significantly bigger than me, but jeez, the shirt sleeves reached past my elbows and the hem almost touched my knees. I had to try really hard to not think about the fact that Dakota was now shirtless, again, and the guys were all quick to literally give me the shirts off their backs.
I walked out and sat on the log across from my friends. I just stared into the fire. I wasn’t going to be able to look at them while I told this story. I don’t want to throw blarne their way, this isn’t about making them feel bad, but they also need to know they are a part of the problem. I took a deep breath, closing my eyes and steeling myself to relive this story out loud for the first time.
I took another deep breath in and let it out slowly, stalling as long as I could before beginning. “It really started a few years ago, nothing major, just getting pushed around for stepping in to stop other, younger, kids from getting pushed around. Bullies don’t like to be told what to do, so, naturally, more and more bullying happened.
As a beta, the damage to me wasn’t that bad at first and I found out I healed pretty quickly from the physical stuff. Unfortunately so did my bully. That’s when my homework would go missing and I started having trouble with my grades. It wasn’t from a lack of doing the work. It was literally being stolen or destroyed. Another thing my bully found out was the power they received from being known to beat up someone with beta blood, and with dad’s very open dislike of me, it was like an open invitation to try and harm me in some way.”
I paused to take a breath. I’ve never put into words what being bullied was like. “The few times I was called into the principal’s office and dad was called in, he never listened to my side of the story and added to whatever beating I had taken before, also greenlighting my torture.
Oliver opened his mouth and made a sound, I’m sure to ask the obvious question. I held my hand up to stop him. I was never going to get through this if they interrupted me.
“I did go to adults. Dad and the principal obviously didn’t believe me. Dad told me if I was too weak to handle my problems, then I was no daughter of his and not to make excuses for missing or poor work. I went to the principal about the physical stuff with other kids, and he told me something similar. We have had kids leave suddenly due to this bully after going to the proper adults to handle it or to try and help me by backing up my story. Teachers have also been removed from the school for trying to help me. I have since learned that school board members and elders are biased and only care for their own interests and not the interests of the students in the school. So I don’t want to hear anything about telling someone, there is no one to tell anymore. Anyone with power doesn’t care and I will not risk someone’s livelihood because I got smacked around a few times.”
I can feel myself getting fired up at the injustice I always feel at the lack of caring from the adults in my world.
“You could have come to us, we would have helped you.”
Cameron says, pointing to all of the guys.
“Would you really?”
I cocked an eyebrow looking at each one of them. They all nod emphatically. “When? In the middle of your invite only circle of friends? While you were entertaining the entire senior class’ population of girls learning the finer points of being men? At all the sporting events with those same people? Hanging out at the diner and wherever else you went? While you were all gone for the summer at training. None of you have ever been this accessible.”
I gestured wildly to them. I close my eyes and take another deep breath, I’m getting worked up and they are not the enemy. They made plenty of mistakes, but that’s not what is the focus.
“What about any of our interactions before Sierra showed up would suggest to me that you give two sh*ts about me? When you were told opnenly and, many times, in m y presence, that I was worthless and an unnecessary blight on the pack? Dad was never shy about his feelings for me and he never cared if I was in listening distance.”
I looked at my brother, who’s face went pale. “Or when you were all spouting your survival of the fittest’ mantra throughout the school. Telling everyone that they should handle their own issues and you were all only going to deal with really major problems’ whatever that means.”
I air quoted, trying not to sound hateful but failing. The guys started shifting uncomfortably and Sierra was shooting daggers at them.
“You gave everyone free reign to openly put down people deemed less, not build them up. You praised people for beating others in training without a second thought to the person who tried their best and put in effort. There can only be one winner, sure, but that doesn’t mean the person who lost is less than the person that won, especially in training. Training is to get everyone better, to give pointers and tips to each person in a spar. You all promoted stepping on others to get ahead, and that all comes back to me.”
New Book: Returned To Make Them Pay
On her wedding anniversary, Alicia is drugged and stumbles into the wrong room—straight into the arms of the powerful Caden Ward, a man rumored never to touch women. Their night of passion shocks even him, especially when he discovers she’s still a virgin after two years of marriage to Joshua Yates.