Filed To Story: Chasing the Rejected Luna's Heart (Clara & Liam) Book PDF Free
I didn’t know why I had allowed myself to hope it might be different this day. To think that this day, out of all the others, he might actually look at me. Instead, he glanced away without a hint of interest, as if this was just another pack meeting that was going on too long and he had better things to go.
As I came to the end of the aisle, I locked eyes with the priestess who was wearing robes similar to mine, even if they were in the same shade of red I would be wearing in a month’s time, when the mark we began tonight would be completed. She was a somber woman, though not unkind. I guess years of presiding over baptisms, funerals and sacred rites had just taken away any sense of brevity she might’ve had about the job.
Supposedly, being the lunar priestess was a great honor, but I somehow doubted it. It certainly wasn’t a job I wanted. Being the pack Luna was a task I wasn’t sure I was up for as it was.
The priestess nodded and all three alphas knelt on the cushions placed on the floor before a low table. It was traditional, just like the robes. It was hard to look graceful kneeling down when a sash was wrapped so tightly around my waist, I couldn’t take a complete breath.
As I knelt at the end of the long table across from the priestess, I bowed my head.”We begin,” the priestess said, holding her hands out as if awaiting a gift bestowed by some divine being who might be lurking in the room unseen. Even if I had been a member of the Lunar Church from before my birth, I still had a hard time believing it. Not that I would ever dare to express such blasphemous doubt, not even to Clara.”Damon, Liam, and Jax,” she continued, looking at each of the men in turn. “You three have been chosen by the gods to lead this pack, and the goddess, in return, has chosen to bestow upon you a most precious gift. The gift of a Luna.” Her voice softened as she looked at me. “All alphas are marked in the flesh by birth. A mark unique among all others, a sacred signifier that he has been chosen by the goddess–for a single mark to be shared by two is a tremendous rarity. To be shared by three is the mark of an extraordinary destiny. One you must now step into, united by your Luna in heart, soul, and flesh. Tonight, we celebrate the inception of that union. A mark in three parts. You must mark your beloved to bind her to you, as you are bound to each other.”
Beloved. I had never actually studied the old rites enough to know that part of the script, but as soon as the words left her mouth, I couldn’t help but look up at the guys for their reactions. Damon and Liam both looked on in solemn reverence, but I regretted glancing Jax’s way the moment he laid eyes on me. There wasn’t just apathy in his gaze anymore. There was anger. Resentment. All my attempts to convince myself it wasn’t directed at me, but rather merely a product of a destiny he found overwhelming, came to nothing at that moment.
I looked back down at my hands, feeling like I was going to be sick. Beloved. No, that was certainly not what I was. Not in the least, and I very much doubted I ever would be. But this was the lot that had been chosen for me. For both of us. If he wanted to sulk about it, so be it. I was going to do my part. I would fulfill my duty to the pack, whether my mate wanted to have a temper tantrum about it or not.
I had to admit, all the pomp and ceremony was having an effect. The room that had been so lively with chatter earlier was now dead silent, and there was an ethereal magic in the space that made it a little easier to believe all of this was more than just tradition. The air had a certain electricity to it, and as the moonlight streamed in through the painted blue glass of the cathedral windows, it felt almost warm on my skin.”The first stage, the sharing of blood,” the priestess announced, taking a silver chalice off the table in front of her and holding it up so its surface glinted brilliantly in the moonlight. She lowered it and picked up a matching silver athame before she passed them both to Liam on her right. “Blood received, and blood given freely.”
Liam took the blade and brought it to his palm. I held my breath and winced as he cut into his life line, but his eyes met mine, glimmering with amusement that made it clear he wasn’t the least bit bothered by that gruesome portion of the ritual.”I give of myself freely,” he said in his silken voice, deep yet gentle, as he made a fist and allowed the blood to trickle into the chalice. The sincerity behind his words made it feel like more than just a ritual, more than just some archaic obligation that required him to go through the motions.
He passed the blade and chalice on to Damon at his right, and the other man did the same, equally unbothered by the cutting of his own flesh. To be fair, even if the wars had ended before he was born, Damon had seen his share of bloodshed as my father’s enforcer. To him, this was probably nothing.”I give of myself freely,” he said, surprisingly reverent. He was so serious and withdrawn, it was hard to imagine he took any of this seriously, but now I wasn’t sure.
My heart was hammering by the time the chalice and athame were passed into Jax’s waiting hands. He was sitting to my right, and I found myself grateful for the fact that I was supposed to keep my head down for most of the ritual since he couldn’t see how flustered I was. I wasn’t sure what I was afraid of, really. Even he wouldn’t outright refuse to go along with the ritual. Especially not knowing it was the only way he was ever going to attain the power he had coveted for as long as I could remember.
He sliced his palm and bled into the chalice, muttering a rather impatient, “I give myself freely.”
Once he was finished, he passed the chalice to me, his fingertips brushing mine. The touch usually would’ve flustered me as well, innocent and insignificant as it was, but at the moment, I was less infatuated and more irritated.
He could at leastpretend like this wasn’t a chore for him. Like he wouldn’t rather be doing his taxes or waiting in line at the DMV.
I took the chalice in both hands and stared down at the mixture of blood, moonlight glinting off the surface and making it look like a crimson mirror. Blood was not exactly a regular part of my diet, so even though I’d had practically a lifetime to come to terms with this part of the ritual, it was still unnerving. Maybe if I had ever shifted into my wolf form, I would’ve felt a bit differently, but that wasn’t going to come until a month from now when the first stage of the mark would allow the beast to awaken under the light of the full moon.
I took a deep breath and brought the chalice to my lips, letting the blood wash over my tongue. It didn’t taste sharp and metallic as I had expected. More like a deep, rich wine, and maybe it was just the power of suggestion brought on by the ritual, but I felt like something shifted within me as I consumed the blood of my mates. Like there was a bond forged somehow, even if it was only the beginning of one.
Fortunately, I didn’t have to drink the whole thing. The priestess nodded in satisfaction, and then I launched into another anxiety attack, knowing what was coming next.”You may claim your mate,” said the priestess. “Once the moon is full and the mark is complete, you will be bound together. Forever.”
I swallowed. I didn’t have the courage to look up and see how the others would react to that. Maybe I just didn’t want to know. It was easier that way.
As the three rose from their spots around the table, my heart pounded even more fiercely against the wall of my chest. I moved back away from the table so there would be room for them. I felt entitled to a little anxiety, considering most Lunas in my position only had to worry about being marked by one male. I had three of them to contend with. Even though I knew what was coming, and knew it had to happen, my fight or flight instincts were still in full force and it took considerable effort to stay where I was. It helped that I knew my father would do something far worse to me if I embarrassed him by making a scene.
Liam knelt down beside me to my left, while Damon took my right side, and Jax knelt directly in front of me. I kept my gaze down on my hands in my lap, resisting the urge to wring them.
When Liam pushed a strand of hair that had fallen from my braid back behind my shoulder, the gentleness of his touch made me shiver. I looked up instinctively, and when I met his eyes, they were full of knowing and reassurance. We didn’t yet share the psychic link he and the others did, but I didn’t need to hear his words to know what he was saying.