Filed to story: Sorry Alpha I Am Wolfless Novel
“It? And what would that be, knucklehead? I can’t read minds, so incomplete sentences are not going to cut it with me.” She laughed at me, and I realized that I hadn’t finished my thoughts properly.
“Do you ever think about the future? Who our mates will be. What our children will be like. What life in general will be like. Do you ever think about those things?”
“Sometimes.” She admitted, causing me to look up into her face. She was my sister, my twin, I had shared the womb with her, and therefore I knew pretty much all there was to know about her. And it also meant that I could tell when she was upset, like she was now.
“What is wrong?” I asked her, not knowing why she was so sad all of a sudden.
“I don’t know. It’s hard to say. I mean, when everything started in the fall, when we started at the university, I thought that I had met my mate. The way that the stuff with Clovio was going, I thought for sure that he was my mate. And there was something about that time, with all that was happening, that made me feel like my wolf was recognizing my mate. Still, she never told me for sure that I actually had met them. I don’t know why, but it’s like my wolf has been silent, like she’s been ignoring me or something.”
“Really?” I thought about it, about my wolf. “I don’t talk to mine, not really, but I know that he is there. I know that he is looking for his mate and that we will find her when the time is right. He doesn’t ignore me though. He is there, always present at the back of my mind.” I explained to her what it was like with my wolf.
“Oh, I know what you mean. And I can sense mine as well, but it’s like her presence is lessened. Even when I shift, it’s like she isn’t all the way there. I don’t know why, but my wolf has been ignoring me lately. For a while really.”
“When did it start?” I asked her, curious to know how long she had been losing touch with her wolf.
“I don’t really know. I think since right before we turned eighteen.”
“Over a year! Rika!” I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. “You’ve been losing touch with your wolf for over a year? How could you keep that a secret?”
“She isn’t gone. And I can still shift, so I know that she is there. It’s not like I am losing touch with her. It’s more like she has gone silent on me. I haven’t heard her much over the last year or so. And I didn’t tell anyone because I didn’t want to make Mom and Dad worry about me. So please, Reagan, don’t tell them.”
“Rika, this isn’t good. You need to find out why she is ignoring you. You need to reconnect with your wolf.” I felt like it was me that was being affected by this, not her. I didn’t like thinking that my sister was suffering like this. What was I going to do to help her? I was the older brother here, so it was up to me to fix this.
“I know.” She nodded at me. “I will do what I can to reconnect with her, I promise. Only, I am going to wait until this whole issue is over. I don’t want to be a bother while we have this issue with the DOE and that Orson guy. I will figure it all out soon, Reagan. I promise you.”
“You’d better.” I narrowed my eyes at her before I looked back down at the baby in my arms. At least I didn’t have to worry about Reeselynn at the moment. She wasn’t going to have these troubles for a long time.
While I was looking at the baby, Rika had been looking at me. She spoke after a long silence as well, not really startling me, but making me look up at her in shock, nonetheless.
“What about you?” That had been all that she said, but it took me by surprise.
“What do you mean, what about me?” I asked her, not sure what she was getting at.
“Do you think about those things? The future? Mates? Families? All that other stuff. You asked me about it, but you never said anything about it.”
“Sorry, you took me by surprise with your comment about not sensing your wolf. And, to be honest, yeah, I think about it a lot. I mean, we’re the same age Mom was when she married Dad, so that means that you might find your mate really soon.”
“You too.” She pointed it out to me. “Why wouldn’t you find her now?”
“Well, Dad was older than Mom by a few years. I might have to wait until I am closer to his age for it to happen.”
“Does that make you sad?” She asked, and I didn’t know how to answer that.
“Yes, and no.” I looked at her. I gave her my full attention. “I want my mate, I know that it will make me happy to find her, but I don’t think that I will be lonely without her. Not at the moment anyway. I know that I have time. And that she is out there. There is no reason for me to think that I will be alone forever.”
“Well, you could be like Uncle Dietrich. He was alone for over five hundred years before he met Uncle Shawn.”
“Ugh, don’t tell me that.” I groaned at the words that Rika had just said. I didn’t want to wait five hundred years to meet my mate.
“You know that if you did have to wait that long, like Uncle Dietrich did, you would just love her that much more. Whoever she will be, I know that she will be a lucky girl. You’re a good guy, Reagan. I should know, I used to share a womb, and a bathtub with you.”
“Shush.” I made a face at her. “I do not need to hear about that.” I pretended like it was a horrible memory for me. In reality, I remembered when we were toddlers too, and how we would always take a bath together. It was something that we had to argue with Mom and Dad with far too often. They wanted to stop them when we were three, but we held out for another year, bathing together until we were four.
“I know that waiting five hundred years seems like a long time, but the point here is that we are looking for our true loves. The other halves of our souls. We don’t want to rush that and think that the wrong person is the one for us. Trust me, I know how that can feel.”
“I know.” I looked at her tenderly, remembering the heartache she had felt before. I didn’t want to see my sister suffering like that, never again.
“Besides, Reagan, I know that you won’t take that long to find your mate. You’re already halfway to the perfect man for whoever she is.”
“Halfway?” I narrowed my eyes at her.
“Yeah, you’re clearly going to be a doting dad. Now you just need to grow a handsome face.”
“Hey!” I would have done something, given her a noogie, punched her arm, something, but I was holding Reeselynn and couldn’t do that even if I wanted to. She just laughed though, thinking that it was funny.
“Yeah, no wonder your wolf is ignoring you. You’re such a child.” I joked with her.
“Yup, we both are. So don’t rush it too much, bro. We will find them when the time is right.” She looked at me then with the baby in my arms. “Besides, no offense to mom or anything, but I want to finish school before I have a baby.”
“She finished school, it was just amid running a kingdom and raising us.”
“Yes, and it was hard on her. I don’t want that. I want to be done with school before I have a baby.”
“Understandable. I don’t want to put my mate through that as well. I want her to do what is best for her.”