Filed To Story: The Omega Destiny
I went an entire day without seeing Thane. That thought probably wouldn’t have been so unsettling if it wasn’t post the best orgasm of my life. I could have dismissed it as alpha duties, raids, rogues etc., but Cyrus had no answer for me as to why I hadn’t seen Thane all day. As his beta, he would know if there was something pack related keeping Thane away. There wasn’t. Clearly the thing keeping Thane away is himself. Or me for that matter, I shouldn’t have been so stupid. Trust was something I didn’t have the luxury of throwing out. I knew better, but I did it anyway. Could be overreacting? Possibly. But my heart hurts nonetheless. I check my phone and wouldn’t you know. Nothing. Not even a check up on the text. He always sent those. Its blaringly obvious he regrets the night of the run. I can’t let my guard down again.
Now I sit on my couch. Much the same as every day. Except, today Ind myself plotting. Plotting my escape from what? Heartbreak apparently. Looking at the facts, its obvious I can’t just up and leave. I have no where to go. No family left. I am totally alone and completely at the mercy of this pack. I have traded one cage for another. This one is a much better cage, don’t get me wrong, but a cage regardless.
I am currently wearing holes in the carpet from my incessant passing and biting of my nails. I am beyond anxious. I pull out my phone, which now consist of three phone numbers, Thane, Eric, and Cyrus. I should probably get Monica’s as well. I pull up a message and send it to rus.
Me: Can you get me out of my rooms. I feel like I am suffocating here.
Cyrus: Have you asked Thane to take you somewhere? Show you around some more?
Me: No. I don’t really want to see him right now.
Cyrus: Oh so I am the lucky guy that can take you around now? I am glad you trust me Ayla.
Me: I don’t trust you. I don’t trust anyone now. I just need to get out and I need to get out now.
I can feel a ripple in my mental barrier. A slight nudge. Aramana is there I can just barely feel her. If she was here right now, she would take us far away. I bet she could find somewhere we could start over. Or we could just be rogues. The two of us alone. We survived all of my last 10 years. She could survive anything. We wouldn’t even need a pack. A few days on our own and she would have all of the wolf survival skills she would need, not to mention my other skills that come from my type of wolf. A type no one can find out about. The longer I stay here, the higher the likelihood of that happening.
Aramana I need you. I need you so bad right now. I push into my mind, desperate. Please don’t leave me alone anymore. I can’t do this. I can sense her, but I can’t contact her. There is something in the way, I just don’t know what.
I slide down the wall of my bedroom. Hands over my eyes, I feel broken. No, I don’t feel it, I am. I am broken. Messed up beyond repair. Damaged goods that Thane doesn’t want. Nobody wants. My own wolf doesn’t even want me. I am utterly and completely helpless, alone. I can’t do this anymore. I can’t feel this way anymore
Looking across the room into the full length mirror, I should see myself, but I don’t. I see the warden. The disgusting alphas that drugged me and had their way with me. I see me helpless on the table, my traitorous omega body doing things I don’t want it to do. I see myself dragged from my cage, beaten and broken. Spit upon and tormented. They are in my thoughts. Behind my eye lids. I can’t escape the monsters. They own me. They will have me forever. Whether I am caged or not. I will never be free.
A sob racks through my chest, but no tears fall my eyes. They are close. Unfortunately, numbness takes over and I find myself staring, in a catatonic like state, reliving one nightmare after another. This is all my life will ever be.
I must have fallen asleep, or something is in my eyes. My eyes are blurry, my vision almost tunneled. I can hear someone talking faintly in the background of my mind. Two someone’s. Their speech garbled, muffled almost. I can’t make out what they are saying, but I can hear their words are getting louder and my body is jostling around. Shaking. Is someone shaking me? Then I hear it. Someone is yelling. Their yells are loud and never??nding. Full of pain and desperation. A feminine voice. Then I hear my name clearly being called while I am shaken around. Am I screaming? I can no longer talk, but apparently in less than 24 hours I can laugh and scream. Life has some cruel jokes. The fates must be laughing at me. They must have spent the last ten years laughing at me.
“Ayla, Ayla. It is me, Thane. Stop hurting yourself. Ayla STOP Thane is here, and he is trying to use an alpha bark on me. Why? I am not sure, unless it is to get me to stop screaming. Alpha parks don’t work on me, but he wouldn’t know that. Well, he knows now I guess. Another secret that is trying to worm its way out of me. “Ayla stop. You are hurting yourself. You need to calm down little wolf. Slow your breathing down and stop clawing your neck.” Clawing my neck? I don’t feel anything. Oh wait, there it is. Pain. Something I am all too familiar with. Yes, apparently I am hurting myself. Why? I don’t know. I am trying to arouse and break through to the chaos around me, but it isn’t working. The warden is here, in my mind. He is beating me. He has the chain around my neck. The chain: ‘s here. I have to get it off. I have to GET IT OFF. “Thane, she’s getting worse. I need to sedate her. She is having a full blown panic attack, probably hallucinating by the looks of her body. She’s trying to get something off of her.” I know that voice. It is Eric, the healer. Yes, he can help me get it off. “Do it. Give her whatever she needs. Hurry.” I feel a small prick to my neck, then a rush of warmth. Darkness floods my vision and the voices stop.
Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. Lub dub. Lub dub. Lub dub. “When will she wake up Eric. What the hell happened back there? I went to check on her and she was screaming and clawing at her neck Nothing I said was helping her at all. Nothing worked.” “Alpha am sure don’t have to explain any of that to you. She was probably Thane. She has severe PTSD which causes hallucinations. I a deep into a hallucination. What we need to figure out was what triggered it. If we can identify her triggers, besides the obvious We can help her avoid this in the future.” “What is the obvious trigger?” Men. Alpha shifters. Anything sexual in nature. Cages, medical injections etc.” “Well, we have spent some time together. Doing various…activities that should have triggered her, but they didn’t. Not at the time anway.” “Alpha, I am not judging, nor do I care. It seems as though she really trusts you. Some emotional trigger must have set her off. A flashback caused by something. It could have been anything.” “Cyrus is outside Eric. Please let him in.” “Sure thing alpha.”