Filed To Story: In the Shadow of the Past Luna (Lily & James)
I looked at my hands.
“I can only tell you what I heard and what I saw. I do not know everything that happened. I have a lot of questions myself.”
“I understand that. I just want to know what happened from your perspective.”
I looked up and studied his face, which is something that I have done a lot today. I look closely at his eyes, searching for any clues about how ready he may be for my answer.
Of course, I do not know why I am bothering to look. I already know that he is not ready. If he had any Idea what the answer to his question would entall, we would not be playing this game and he would not have made any of the jokes that he just made.
“He may not be ready, but he needs to know, Luke does too,”
Rose tells me.
“Will knowing help anything?”
I ask Rose
“It will when it comes to his relationship with Sheila.”
I cringe. Hearing Sheila’s name always triggers me, in both good and bad ways.
Tonight, I will use it in a good way. I will finally tell James the truth.
“I was upstairs with Stephanie before she went downstairs to watch a movie with you. Before she left, she asked me to meet her in the forest at midnight. She said that she had something special that she wanted to show me. 1
I was late meeting her, because I got… wrapped up. I did not make it to our meeting spot in the woods until around 12:20 in the morning. When I got there, Stephanie and Sheila were waiting for me. They were angry that I was late, and they told me that we needed to hurry.
Stephanie grabbed me by the hand and the three of us went deeper into the forest. As we moved closer to the pack border, I started to smell the scent of rogues. I mentioned it to Stephanie and Sheila, and they told me to shut up.”
I paused and stood up. I was not sure if James would believe the next part of the story, and I did not want to be looking at him when disbelief crossed his eyes. I took a few steps towards the fireplace and focused on staring at the raging fire.
“After a few minutes, we approached a clearing. There was a campfire off to the side, and there were several males sitting around it drinking beers. They all smelled like rogues. I started to get really scared, but as soon as we got close enough, Stephanie went up to the males and hugged them and introduced Sheila. The rogues gave Stephanie and Sheila each a beer.
I stood back, trying to blend in with the bushes. However, after toasting one of the rogues, Stephanie pointed at me. She told the rogues that she brought the present they requested. She said…”
I stopped talking. The memory was overwhelming me. I did not want to re-live it. I looked towards the ocean. A part of me wished that there was a way for the ocean to take me away from all of this.
James said nothing. Instead, he came up behind me and put his hand on my shoulder. When I did not resist his touch or push him off, he reached for my hand and gently pulled me back to the couch. To my surprise, Instead of pulling me onto the seat next to him, he pulled me onto his lap.
I leaned the side of my head against his chest, still avoiding eye contact.
“Please keep going, Lily,”
he said.
“You can do this, Lily. You are strong.”
Rose linked.
Taking a deep breath, I wiped a couple of tears from my eyes.
“Stephanie…. Stephanie. Stephanie told the rouges that I was 14 and a virgin. Two of them came towards me and began circling me like I was their prey. They started to talk about who would get to have the first taste. 1
I took a few steps backwards, but Sheila yelled at me to stop being such a coward. She told me that I should let loose and have a little fun. She claimed that doing so would serve my future mate well, because no male wolf wants a boring lay with no experience.
I was getting more and more scared. Stephanie and Sheila continued to drink their beers and laugh and talk to the rogues as though they were old friends.
After a few more minutes, the two rogues who were circling me announced to the others that they were going to have private time with me. I knew exactly what that meant.”
My heart started racing as I continued to re-live the memory in my mind. I felt James begin to rub circles on my back. I reached back and brushed his hand away, but I continued to sit on his lap and lean into his chest.
“I had a switchblade in my pocket. I pulled it out and opened it. I showed the weapon to the men and warned them to stay back and leave me alone.
Sheila and Stephanie came walking over to me. Sheila rolled her eyes and grabbed the knife from me. She started making fun of me, saying it was silly for me to think any of them would be afraid of a st upid little knife. Sheila asked Stephanie if Stephanie was afraid of the knife, and Stephanie rolled her eyes and said ‘of course not.’
Sheila then told me to go on and have fun with the boys. She said I could consider the experience a present for me as well.
I told her to f&&k off. That made her angry. She got an evil look in her eyes, and then held the knife loosely against Stephanie’s neck. Stephanie laughed and brushed the knife away, but Sheila moved it immediately back to Stephanie’s neck.
Stephanie got annoyed with Sheila and they started to bicker. Sheila said that she would keep doing it until I accepted their birthday present. Stephanie eventually yelled at me to just go already.
I was scared.
But I went.
The rogues took me to a grassy area about 50 yards away. They told me to lay down, which I did. They began to remove their pants at the same time. I was close enough to them that I could kick them both in the groin, so I did. As hard as I possibly could.
I then got up and I ran. As soon as I got close enough that I thought other wolves might hear me, I began screaming for help. And I kept screaming until the guards came.”
I wiped several tears from my eyes.
“I have no idea what happened after I ran. If I had known what they would do to Stephanie when I left, I….”
I let the sentence trail off. The truth of the matter is that I do not know what I would have done. Nor do I know what I could have done. I would like to think that I could have done something, but what, I am not
(James POV)
No. This is not real. None of this is real.
Stephanie would never hurt anyone, much less her own sister. Stephanie may not have been my true mate, but I still spent years with her. I knew her, and I knew her character. I spent years loving her! And not just me, but also my parents and the entire pack. It is not possible that we all got it wrong.
It is not possible that any of that night played out the way that Lily claims.
It just did not happen. None of it is true.
It is not true.
I refuse to believe that it is true. It simply cannot be true.
Lily is clearly lying.
“James, you can continue to tell yourself that it is a lie, but Lily is telling the truth,”
Luke links me.
“I know,”
I link back.
And I do.
I just don’t want to know. I want to go to sleep and have this conversation be nothing but a bad dream. A
really bad, horrible dream.
How much more can I take? How many more bombs are waiting to go off in my life?
I do not know what Lily was thinking when I touched her shoulder and pulled her onto my lap. I honestly do not know what I was thinking either. I just knew that, at that point in the story, I needed to touch her. I needed to share her burden. And I needed something, someone to hold onto.
Of course, I do not know why I was feeling that way.
Because, after all, it is not true. Stephanie did not set up her little sister to get raped. Sheila did not hold a knife to Stephanie’s throat, even in jest. Sheila did not tell Lily that getting raped should be considered a birthday gift. Stephanie did not associate with rogues.
None of it is true.
None of it happened.
Lily has an amazing imagination. ‘Lily is a great actress. Lily misunderstood what happened.
None of it is true. None of it.
I knew Stephanie. I trusted Sheila.
All of this is a lie. Lily broke the game rule about being honest. (1)
New Book: Veiled Desires of the Alpha King Novel
Dayson was the alpha of the largest pack in North America. Powerful figures from other packs sought to offer gorgeous girls as potential mates for Dayson. He steadfastly rejected these advances, he was not a pawn to be manipulated. But eventually there came a mysterious girl he could hardly say No. Who was she?