Filed To Story: Destined Bond with My Forbidden Alpha Novel (Alpha Alexander & Selene)
“If you try hard enough and close your eyes long enough, you will always be able to find an excuse for someone’s bad choices,” she said. “But at the end of the day, it was still a choice they made, and it was still bad.”
Axel swallowed down the painful feeling that was growing in his chest.
“You know she never wanted anyone to get hurt,” he said. “She thought she could keep them safe.”
Corrine met his eyes, and he saw the weariness, anger, and sorrow that lived in them.
“The only reason that Myka and those children were ever in danger is that Selene changed this report,” Corrine replied, holding the paper. “Because she lied to everyone and chose to take that risk with their lives.”
Corrine sat back, feeling the exhaustion of the conversation settling over her.
“I know it, Alice knows it, and Selene knows it,” Corrine sighed. “The only one trying to make excuses for her, is you.”
Axel took a deep breath and lowered his head.
“I just… I don’t want her to feel any more burdened than she already does,” he sighed. “She is so… lost. I’m afraid of what she might do.”
Corrine sighed and laid her head back. She was tired. Though she had a different approach to handling Selene, she, too, was worried about her.
“Selene has never willingly been rescued,” she said. “Trying to save her will only lead to being dragged down with her. She must find her way out of the problem, or she’ll stay lost forever.”
“I don’t know how to ignore her pain,” he said.
“I didn’t say ignore it, just don’t try to solve it for her,” Corrine said.
Axel sighed. He leaned his head back into his chair and closed his eyes.
“It’s not your first time dealing with her, Axel. You know how, but right now, you pity her too much to realize it. And she knows that.”
He thought of the few conversations he had had with Selene since the war ended. Every one of them had been an argument. She had not come to him until she needed something, and he had not gone to her, knowing she didn’t want him to.
He had kept tabs on her, hearing from different sources about her days and nights spent at the mountainside trying to find a way back to the ley line. About all the hours she spent in the library searching through every history book for anything that might even hint at a possible solution.
Axel did know how to deal with Selene. He had learned long ago that the only way to get her to move past her tantrums was to challenge her. To refuse to give in to her whims.
He had done that when he refused to hold off on his plans to unite the packs, but that had been easy. He couldn’t put her needs before all the wolves in the territories.
But after he saw her day after day struggling to move forward. After, he stood outside her home and listened to her sobbing from another day without answers. And after seeing the pained and resentful look in her eyes when she saw him with Alice, or when she heard about Bell moving to Summer, he couldn’t bear to hurt her anymore.
He wanted to help her.
The mission to Moonguard had sounded like too much of a risk from the start, but against his better judgment, he agreed to at least send the scout to check. After he received the report, there had been a hint of doubt, but he knew how much she wanted to go.
Axel sighed.
It was difficult and tiring to balance his desire to protect her and what she needed from him.
He took another deep breath. He was exhausted. He hadn’t had a good night’s rest since Alice had left. His days were filled with work to avoid his worries for his sister or his longing for his mate.
Corrine stood up from her chair.
“Go talk to Alice. She is the one you should be worried about. Pregnancy is difficult enough, but twins and conflict with your mate on top of that?” she said with a click of her tongue and an irritated glance. “I should smack you silly.”
Axel gave a gentle smile.
“I wouldn’t stop you,” he said.
“I know,” Corrine said, returning his smile.
She leaned forward over the desk and touched his cheek.
“Try not to be so hard on yourself,” she said. “None of it is your fault. So let it go and move forward.”
Corrine stepped away, turning to leave.
“Do you really blame her?” he asked before she reached the door. “Do you really hold Selene responsible for what happened in Moonguard?”
Corrine paused and thought for a moment before answering.
“She is responsible for what happened in Moonguard,” she said. She looked back at Axel and added. “But no, I don’t blame her.”
Axel furrowed his brow.
“Aren’t they the same?” he asked.
Corrine smiled.
“Selene’s decisions directly led to the event. In that way, she is responsible for what happened. But,” she said. “I can understand how she could have gotten to a place where she felt like she had to do it. Where she could justify it to herself.”
Axel heard the sadness in Corrine’s voice.
“Once you can understand how someone can make a bad decision, it becomes increasingly difficult to blame them for it or to hold on to the anger from it,” she continued. “I suspect that Alice is struggling with something similar.”
Axel sat up.
“You think she is having a hard time because she understands what Selene did?” he asked.
Corrine shook her head.
“No,” she smiled. “Alice has actually always understood Selene better than most.”
Axel thought back to when Alice had been the one to defend his sister. It was true. She was able to make him see Selene clearer many times. Though she always claimed to dislike Selene, he knew she held a begrudging affection for her.
“I meant with you,” Corrine said. “I would guess that she is struggling with your decisions. The two of you have always shared such a strong trust in each other. She has never had a reason to question or doubt what you say or do.”
Axel swallowed, remembering Alice’s words.
‘But, hearing you make excuses for Selene, as her decisions hurt members of my family…. It’s the first time I have felt disappointed in you. It’s my first time questioning whether I could rely on you.’
He let out a shaky breath.
“Becoming a mother can change the way you see things. What you can accept and what you can ignore,” Corrine continued. “What you really need from the person you love.”
Axel felt a hard knot in his stomach.
‘… Will there be any of you left for me and our children?’
Is that what Alice had meant?
He lifted his fist to the door, hovering just inches above it as he hesitated to knock.
Axel took a deep breath and quickly tapped on the door. He swallowed nervously as he waited for an answer. Then, after a few silent moments, he raised his hand and knocked several times, a little harder this time.
But there was still no answer.
He wondered if he should leave. If she was out or at an appointment. He hadn’t called or let her know he was coming. So she had no reason to expect him.
Taking another breath, he knocked one last time. Finally, when enough time had passed, he sighed. Then, just as he was about to turn and walk away defeated, he got one last idea.
He reached out and touched the handle. Would she be angry at him for walking in? Would she feel like he wasn’t respecting her wish for space?
“If it’s locked, I’ll leave,” he whispered. “If it’s unlocked… I should go in just to make sure everything is safe inside.”
He nodded to himself as he grabbed hold of the handle and turned. It was unlocked.
Axel swallowed and then leaned in through the door.
“Alice?” he called out. “The door was unlocked… I knocked a few times, but I wanted to make sure everything was all right…”
He looked around the living room. It was decorated in only the basics. Peter had moved out, leaving this house open for whoever might need it next. Only simple furnishings were left behind.
“Alice?” Axel called out again, walking into the kitchen. “Are you here?”
The living room was empty.
The kitchen was empty.
The downstairs bedroom and bathroom were empty.
“I guess she’s out,” he sighed sadly.
Axel walked back to the front door; he reached down to open it when her scent hit his nose. She was everywhere in this place. But only a soft lingering hint of her. This was more than that. It was fresh and warm.
Axel swallowed as it moved over him like the soft touch of her fingertips. He turned and sniffed the air, following its direction. He furrowed his brows when he realized that it led up the stairs.
He looked back down the hall. He had seen her clothing in the bedroom and her toiletries in the bathroom. Going up and down the stairs every day was not something she should have been doing, so why did her scent lead up? There should have been no reason for her to go upstairs.
But that was where her scent led, so he would follow.
“Alice? Are you up here?” he called out as he climbed the stairs.
Still no response, but with each step he took, her scent grew stronger.
As he reached the bedroom, he closed his eyes and leaned his forehead against the door. Her scent danced around him. He breathed it in, letting his mind drift into the warmth it offered him. He saw her smile and heard her laugh. Felt her lips against his and her arms around him.
Axel swallowed and took a shaky breath as he pushed the happy memories away.
“Alice?” he called through the door before he knocked.
New Book: Veiled Desires of the Alpha King Novel
Dayson was the alpha of the largest pack in North America. Powerful figures from other packs sought to offer gorgeous girls as potential mates for Dayson. He steadfastly rejected these advances, he was not a pawn to be manipulated. But eventually there came a mysterious girl he could hardly say No. Who was she?