Filed to story: Sorry Alpha I Am Wolfless Novel
“Lucas? What is it? Tell me, please.” I was almost begging him. As I sat on my bed, hugging my knees to my chest, I asked him to tell me what it was that was going on. I needed to know. Even though I had a feeling that it was going to be something that was hard for me to hear.
“Rika, I am sorry, but Westin is moving.”
“What?!” I practically screamed the word at him. “He’s moving? Why? Is this because I got mad at him?” I thought that this was quite the response to this situation. I had yelled at him, yes, but I had been feeling so hurt and vulnerable at the time. Why would he move away just because of that? What was I going to do now?
“Yes. I don’t think that it has to do with you though, Rika. I heard him talking to someone and he said that he was moving because of his mate.” Lucas continued to explain a little, but I was still reeling. It took the word mate to bring me out of my reverie.
“His mate?” I asked him in shock. “When did he find his mate? I wasn’t aware that he had met them yet.”
“I didn’t know that he had met her either. But I know that he is moving because of her. I don’t know if she is leaving the area for something and he is moving with her or what, but I know that this has to do with his mate. So don’t feel so bad, Rika, this isn’t your fault.”
“O..OK.” I still didn’t feel good about this. How was I to know for sure that this wasn’t my fault? Was this really all because Westin had found his mate? Was he leaving for something other than me telling him that I didn’t want to see him again? Or was he leaving and taking his mate because he didn’t want to be around the spoiled rotten princess anymore? I don’t know why, but I had a feeling that the last one was the closest to the truth.
“Come on, Rika, let’s get you down to lunch. I am sure that you are bored and want to be out of this room for now.” Lucas was smiling and acting as calm as he possibly could. How was he not more affected by this? Probably because he didn’t feel like it was all his fault.
I was in a trance for the rest of the day. I felt so guilty about what I had said to Westin and that he was leaving. I hated that I had been a bitch to him and everyone else. And if I had needed more evidence that my behavior was affecting those around me, then this was it. This was all that I needed to see to know that it was time for me to grow up. I wasn’t going to act like the same entitled little baby anymore. I was going to be more mature and responsible. And that also meant that I needed to call Lyssa and apologize to her. I had a lot of mistakes to make up for.
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Talia
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I had fallen asleep while in my mom’s office earlier. I hadn’t meant to, but I ended up slumping over and passing out right on Lex’s arm. He probably was uncomfortable that whole time and ended up just carrying me to my room so that he didn’t have to deal with me anymore. I wouldn’t blame him. Who wants a sleeping person that might drool laying on them? Then again, I didn’t usually drool in my sleep, so he was probably safe from that. Not that it mattered much.
When I woke up, Lex was sitting in the chair across the room from me, next to the window with the shade drawn. He was sound asleep. It was as if he had sat down to take a break after carrying me to my room and instantly fell asleep as well. I knew that he had been up all night as well, so he had to have been exhausted. And it was all my fault that he was awake too. I had been pacing and grumbling in my room the whole night, at least until the vision overtook me. Then I was silent for like five minutes, just long enough for him to drift off before I started to scream blood murder. And considering that I was literally covered in blood, it was like it really had been a murder.
We had been so busy lately, and there had been so much that had happened since we came home, that I just hadn’t been able to relax at all. And since I wasn’t relaxing, neither was Lex. And that made me feel so bad. Not only was I keeping him from finding a mate, but I was ruining his ability to calm down and relax. I didn’t know why he was so adamant about being my guard when he knew that it was going to be such a difficult job. This situation might not last forever, but there would be other ones in the future. As the goddess of the underworld, I just knew that there was going to be a lot for me to endure and face on my own.
Still, he chose to stick by me. He wanted to be the number one guard to the future ruler of the underworld. And I knew that this wasn’t a bid for power. He just felt that he owed that to me. He thought that, as a former guard in the underworld that came to live in the mortal realm, he was the one that was the most qualified to protect me.
…..
Of course, Rudy was also in the same position as him. A former guard in the underworld that now lived with us in the mortal world. However, Rudy was different. He was soft, sweet, and trusted more people than Lex ever would. And I think that, in Lex’s opinion, Rudy was too soft to be my primary guard when I moved and started to live in the underworld. And I agreed with him as well. Rudy wouldn’t be the right choice to be my right hand man when I was there. I needed someone stronger. I needed someone more powerful. And, more importantly, I needed someone that I could trust with absolutely no doubts in my mind. And since Rudy had a family, I didn’t know where his loyalty would lie in the end. Lex though, he didn’t have a family, as sad as that was, so I knew that he would think of me first and foremost.
As I thought about all of this, I walked into the bathroom to get some relief. I washed my hands, then my face. For good measure I also brushed my teeth and then pulled my hair back into a neat ponytail. After that, I was ready to face the day, and the man sleeping in my room.
I thought that I was going to be waking Lex up when I went back into the bedroom, but he was sitting up and looking at me with a calm expression on his face.
“Did you sleep well?” He asked me as soon as I was out of the bathroom.
“Yes, I did.” I nodded at him. “I know that I didn’t sleep all that long, but I feel a lot better.” I was used to not sleeping much anyway. It came with the territory when the souls of the dead wailed at you all the time. Still, these couple of hours felt like a whole night to me.
“I am glad that you got some sleep.” He gave me the smallest of smiles in response. “I too am feeling rested after sleeping. And I do apologize that I fell asleep here.” He looked around the room but did not get up.
“It is fine, Lex. It was my fault that you didn’t sleep at all last night. So, please, don’t worry about it.” I didn’t want to add that it might have been him in here, my subconscious knowing that I was being protected, that helped me to sleep so soundly. I was sure that he would take it the wrong way. All I meant by that was that he was there for me and I knew that he wouldn’t let me get hurt. He was the best type of bodyguard that there was for me. Strict with the rules and powerful enough to protect me from pretty much anything. Well, anything but a vision.
“Shall I take you down to the dining room? I am sure that you are hungry for some lunch.” Right on cue my stomach growled and grumbled loudly. “I knew it.” He grinned, but then his stomach answered mine.
“I see that you are hungry as well.” I gave him a quick laugh and walked toward the door. “Come on, we both need to eat something soon.”
When we got to the dining room, I saw that my parents were the only other ones in there.
“I see you slept well.” Mom said as soon as she looked at me. “You’re looking better.”
“Yeah, I did, and I feel a lot better.” I nodded and answered her. “Did Abigail make lunch for us all, or just you two?”
“She has plenty.” Dad said as he reached across the table to pat my hand. “I am glad that you are feeling better.” He gave me a wary look. “How do you feel though? Physically? Shifting can cause pain afterwards.”
“I’m fine.” I moved my limbs and flexed some muscles on my body and there was no pain at all.
“That’s a relief.” And he truly looked like it was too.
We sat in silence as Abigail brought food for my parents and noticed me. She smiled and said that she would be back in a moment with some for me. I told her to get some for Lex as well, since he hadn’t eaten in a long time. He tried to refuse, but I insisted. He needed to keep his strength up as well. There was a battle coming, and we didn’t know how long it was going to be before it started.
While we ate, sitting in near perfect silence, I had a thought that occurred to me. There was something that I needed to tell my parents. Though, I guess that asking was the better way to go about it.
“Mom? Dad?” I pushed my plate aside and looked at them with a calm and serious expression.
“Yes, Tally?” Dad knitted his brows together as he tried to puzzle out why I was suddenly so serious.
“There is something that I want to tell you. Well, I will pose it as a question, but it’s more of me telling you what I want to do.” I hoped that the look on my face conveyed that I could not and would not be swayed from this idea.
“Go ahead.” Mom pushed her food away and gave me her full attention.