Filed to story: Sorry Alpha I Am Wolfless Novel
“Like hell I can’t take you over there.”
At that point, Joaquin started to turn off all of the machines. When he was done, he turned to me and started to unhook the wires from my body. All of them.
“Joaquin? How is it you know what you are doing right now?” I was shocked to see his quick and efficient moves.
“Who do you think gave you your sponge baths?” He chuckled at his own answer. “I know how to do all of this. I could hook you back up too if I wanted. I did it all the time while you were asleep. I didn’t let anyone else except for Griffin help me with taking care of you. You’re my wife, my Little Bunny, and it was my responsibility.”
“Joaquin.” I felt my heart begin to melt as I listened to him. “Thank you. Thank you for loving me and caring so much for me.”
“Riviana, my sweet, sweet, Riviana, you can be so fucking dense sometimes.” He laughed as he scooped me up into his arms. “You’re so fucking smart, but you can be so stupid when you want to be. Of course I love you. And of course I am going to care for you. You’re my wife, the mother of my children, and my mate. We were born to be together. There is nothing in this world that could ever change that.”
“I know. Still though, I wanted to thank you for it.”
The moment that he sat me down on the bed, I sighed in relief. The mattress was so soft and so luxurious. It felt like heaven compared to the hospital bed. And it was just what my poor exhausted soul needed after traversing through the underworld for three months.
“This is amazing. I had almost forgotten what my own bed felt like. This is exactly what I needed.”
“Little Bunny, I am sorry that I wasn’t here for you. I am sorry that you felt the need to hide everything from me.” I knew that Joaquin was going to feel this way. He had been the one here to try and hold everything together while I was gone. He was the one that truly needed to be consoled, but here he was catering to me still. All because I couldn’t even lift my arms at the moment.
“No, Joaquin, I am sorry. I shouldn’t have tried to be a superwoman and do everything on my own. I was reckless.”
“Let’s stop blaming ourselves. I have a feeling that this will go on for a long time if we keep it up.” I could see the smile that was playing on his lips. Joaquin really was the best man that I could have ever hoped for. He was always there for me no matter what. I knew now just as I have known for a long time, Joaquin was the best.
“Joaquin, tell me all that I missed. Tell me what happened while I was away. I need to know.”
“I will.” He smiled and nodded at me. “I will tell you all about the things that you missed. That is, after you tell me what I didn’t see on that screen. I want to know what you went through. Tell me everything, Little Bunny. Please. Start at the beginning and explain it all to me.”
He meant it too. He wanted to know everything that happened, and he definitely didn’t want me to skip over anything.
“Fine, Joaquin. I will tell you.”
And so, I did. I told him about the voice that led me from my office and toward the throne room. I told him about seeing what I thought were imps at first and the mysterious door that was just standing here in the hallway. He was curious about that little bit. He thought it was interesting that I had heard him and the kids talking when I first went into that world. I told him how it gave me strength to keep moving on.
He didn’t like the idea of the other me very much. When I told him what she did and said he was murderously angry. The only problem was that she was inside of me so it wasn’t like he could kill that person that hurt me. She was me.
He wasn’t surprised about me seeing Franny, but he was surprised that she attacked me. He was angry that I kept getting attacked over and over again. There honestly had been a lot of them, hadn’t there?
I continued on. I told him about every level of hell that I had been in so far and about every obstacle that I had encountered. It was quite the long tale and I know that by the time that Joaquin had heard everything that happened before I got to the Hall of Damnation, he was about to have a panic attack. I knew this because his face was pale, his eyes were rimmed and red and filled with anger, and his breathing was heavy.
“All of this happened to you?” He was pissed off. “You and our boys went through all of that stuff?” He was trying to keep his breathing calm as he spoke.
“Yes, Joaquin, all of that is what happened to me.” I was nodding at him with a solemn look on his face.
“OK, let’s forget about the souls that the fucking bitch, Hekate, sent after you. Let’s put them on the back burner for a moment. She seriously sent a hell hound and a hell snake after you? That bitch had better be glad that she is already dead. I swear by all the celestials and every fiber of my being, I would have hunted her down and killed her if you hadn’t already done it, Little Bunny.”
“I know, Joaquin.” Everyone that knew Joaquin and me knew that he was telling the truth. He would have been so mad if he knew about all of this before I got back. I am just glad that he didn’t know about it. That made it a lot easier when he came to me. He was able to hug me and not be angry about the other things that had happened.”
“Little Bunny, if anything would have happened to you and the boys. If you and them would have been hurt. I..I don’t know what I would have done.” He looked so lost and lonely.
“I know, Joaquin. That was why I wanted to make sure that I protected the babies while I was over there. When I knew that they were our babies, when I found out that I was pregnant with them back there, it made all of those protective mother instincts kick in.” I did my best to assure him that I wouldn’t have let anything happen to Zachary, Zander and Zayden.
“But what about you, Little Bunny. Who was protecting you? Who was going to stop you from getting hurt? When I think about how close you came to getting hurt and dying while fighting that fucking dragon, that piece of shit goddess, I can’t tell you how badly I wanted to go and help you. Do you know how hard it was to just sit here and watch you fight? I could barely contain the anger in my heart.”
“Joaquin..” If I would have been able to move, I would have pulled him closer to me so that I could hold him and kiss him. He needed to be comforted, that was what he was missing for so long. But I couldn’t do that. I couldn’t help him. “I love you, Joaquin.” I almost sobbed when I told him this.
“I love you too, Little Bunny.”
****
Riviana
****
“Alright Joaquin, I told you about my entire time in the underworld. Now I want to know what happened to you and the kids while I was gone. I want to know what happened to my babies and my husband. No matter how hard it will be for me to hear it all, I still want to know about it. I want to hear every detail. I need to know how much I hurt my children.”
“Wasn’t it obvious what they felt? Didn’t you already see that, Little Bunny?” Joaquin was obviously trying to stop me from hearing what happened. It must be horrible. This was the part about leaving that was the hardest for me. How could I upset my children in this way? And my husband? How could I leave all of this on him?
“Joaquin, I-.”
“No, Riviana, I will tell you. Don’t worry. I just don’t know why you want to know. Can’t we just leave it as it is?” I had to make him understand this. I had to make him see why it is that I wanted to know what happened, no matter how sad it was.
“Joaquin, when you leave on your business trips, don’t you always ask me how the kids are. Even when they are sad that their daddy is gone, and they miss you like crazy. Even when you know you are just going to get sad when I tell you. Don’t you still want to know? This is no different, Joaquin. The only change here is that I was physically here but my soul was gone. And, of course, I was gone for a lot longer. But those things don’t matter right now. What matters is that I know what happened to you and the kids while I wasn’t here.”
After I spoke, I looked down at my massive belly with a sad look.
