Filed to story: Sorry Alpha I Am Wolfless Novel
It wasn’t easy, but we got here. It is cold, but I will do what I can to protect my son.
Following that quick entry I can see where several pages had been either cut or torn away. The next entry was in the following year.
April 30, 1515
It has been two years now since Rhinum died to save me and the baby he didn’t even know about. I wish he was here with me now. I had to change my name so that no one could find me. I fear it is the first of many name changes. I am now calling myself Ravina. Thankfully, Underhill is a common enough name. I will not need to change that at all.
The entries came fewer and fewer now. They were spaced out and it was like she only wrote from time to time because she was either too busy or had nothing to report.
October 31, 1518
Fynn is five today. He is strong, smart, and honorable just like his father. He wanted to know so much about his dad, but I just don’t have enough to tell him.
April 30, 1523
Ten years now. Fynn will be reaching the age where he can shift into a wolf, if he has one, very soon. I cannot believe it has been this long already. And I have never loved another man since. My heart still yearns for my mate that I barely got to know. And even though it’s been ten years, I have not aged a day. I still look twenty-one; however, everyone else continues to get older around us. I think we will need to move again soon.
September 19, 1526
Fynn shifted today. He has a wolf that is strong and powerful. It is red, like his hair, but I can see so much more to the color. Is that just my imagination, or is his father still there with him in spirit?
January 22, 1532
We stayed too long in this village. I should have left long ago. Fynn is almost eighteen now, and I still look the same. People have noticed that I am not aging. I think they will accuse me of being a witch soon.
April 30, 1540
Twenty-seven years. That is how long it has been. My son is a grown man, and I have just now told him what he really is. He seems to have his father’s longevity, his extended life. And somehow I inherited it as well. I continue not to age, and Fynn stopped aging long ago.
April 30, 1550
I have changed names again. I am going with Patience now. I have to have patience with the people of the world, or I will lose my temper with them. Fynn changed his name as well. He now goes by Beacon. I also notice now, that I am only writing on the anniversary of my lost love’s death. Not every anniversary, but some of them.
April 30 1560
Ten more years and another move is coming for us. It seems ten years is the max we can stay somewhere. And I have had to resort to referring to my son as my brother or cousin. Otherwise people get suspicious of us right away.
I skimmed the rest of the entries. It seemed they moved around Europe and Asia and then eventually came to the ‘New World’ sometime at the beginning of the eighteenth century. They didn’t have an easy life. Ellyria went through several names before having the one that Gabriel had first found: Ellyria, Ravina, Patience, Joselyn, Josephina, and finally Jazmin. She reused some of the names apparently, but not for long. Gordon, my great grandfather, had been born Fynn then went through his list of names: Beacon, Eleazar, Kiran, Raiden, Toivo, Truman, and then finally Gordon.
My family, on both sides, had suffered so much tragedy. By the time that I was done, I couldn’t help it, but I was sobbing for them all. And to know that Gordon had met his mate, found his love and gotten married only to be shipped off to war and die before he could meet his daughter. He suffered the same fate that his father had. It broke me.
“Shhh.” Joaquin shushed me over and over. I couldn’t stop crying for a long time. I do actually believe that I fell asleep in his arms before the tears stopped, and neither of us said a word the whole time, it was just Joaquin’s shushing noises.
****
Riviana
****
The day after I read the letters, I felt rested and rejuvenated. I also realized that Joaquin had been the one to get up in the middle of the night to feed the babies with the stored milk. However, since I hadn’t gotten up at all through the night, I had more milk than I needed for the morning so I asked Joaquin if he could feed Regan and Rika again and let me pump out the excess to store for later.
He agreed with no complaint, and it was getting easier now that the babies were older. They could hold the bottles on their own, and Joaquin just needed to keep an eye on them. The whole time that I was pumping for the morning I thought about what I needed to do.
In truth, I needed to call the Fae Queen and let her know what had happened. She might even be able to help us figure out who my Fae ancestors are. If they were still alive that is. I already knew that my great great grandfather had died, but aside from that I didn’t know who was family and who wasn’t. This was going to be difficult.
After Joaquin left and went to work for the day, I asked Lila to watch the babies while I worked on contacting the Fae Queen. I didn’t know how to do it since I didn’t know if she had a phone.
“Hey Riviana, how is it going?” Acacia answered the phone almost immediately. Her babies were almost six months old now and she sounded like she was tired.
“Hey, Casey. You sound tired.”
“Oh, that I am, the boys are so exhausting, they are into everything. I look away for one second, and they’ve crawled two rooms away already. It’s crazy how fast they are.” I was laughing at it as she spoke, but I knew the feeling. Mine were the same way.
“Yeah, I can imagine. Two is hard, I can’t even imagine three.”
“I love it though. I love being a mommy.”
“Me too. Hey, listen, I need to talk to Queen Gloriana.”
“Aunt Glory? Why? Is something wrong?”
“Not wrong, not really anyway. But I need to talk to her about something really important.”
“OK, I will tell you how to do it. She might be busy since she was joining the nobles on the hunt, and that can last for a long time. If she doesn’t answer, just leave a message, she will get back to you when she can.”
